


Zakai the Exiled Echani

by Rantourus



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Legends - All Media Types
Genre: But I rather be a Bounty Hunter, Depression, Domestic Fluff, Domestic Violence, Exile, Expanded Universe, Extended Universe, F/M, Family Loss, It's not murder if there is no body, Jealousy, Loss of Identity, Mand'alor, Mandalor, Mandalorian, Murder, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rape, Unplanned Pregnancy, Whoops I am a Merc now, artwork
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-09-05
Packaged: 2018-11-05 17:06:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 39
Words: 18,411
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11017767
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rantourus/pseuds/Rantourus
Summary: This is a collection of shorts and artwork about my character Zakai.What does one do when everything is taken? Rebuild and come back with a vengeance that is what you do. You claw your way back into the world that you were cast from and remind them why you are who you are. But what happens when a much large wrench is thrown into your plans? Do you follow this new rabbit trail? Or do you cast it aside and continue on your fight to get back to where you think you belong?





	1. First Time is Always the Hardest

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cander's Player](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Cander%27s+Player).



Sitting in the cold dark cargo hold, no one could see the tears, hear the cursing under her breathe. The young girl that was Nashea Lusmunt, pulled tight into a ball. She had nothing to her name, no weapons, no armor, nothing but the clothing on her back and boots on her feet. Just a scared sixteen year old girl, who had visions of the horrors she had created with her own hands. Every time she closed her eyes it happened, a flash of the faces would dance in front of her.   
  
When she finally passed out, it was dreamless, restless sleep. Being awoken by banging on the durosteel door, she startled awake, hearing the human freighter pilot speak, “Come on girl, time to get off mah ship!” Nashea groaned and scooped herself up, shuffling listlessly to the open door. Left hand clasped around her right upper arm. “Keep going, kid. and welcome to Coruscant.” Nashea looked a little doe eyed out of the door frame, it was a hanger on a tier just above the fog level, nothing had ever looked so strange to her. “Get going, kid.”  
  
The wide eyed silver hair girl, stumbled off the ship and gulped. She was lucky to have come from a good family, she knew galactic basic, she knew a lot more than most. Never seeing this planet in person she was in awe of it, as she slowly pushed out of the hanger bays and to one of the many walk ways spanning the city planet. Hands firmly grasping the polished durosteel railing as she looked around. This was to be her new home, now all she had to do was find a way to live.


	2. What’s in a Name?

_Ceaki Lomrath_  
_Lollo Holdol_  
 _Aretri Ramscran_  
 _Anahkou Prudril_  
 _Coratami Tabemil_

So many names in the past year alone trying to just work or steal anything she could just to live. So many times she could have just let her life go and fall away. Glancing at the shitty little dive bar in the slums of Coruscant, last place that had a hand written 'we’re hiring' sign out front.  
  
“ Zakai Urora Kasque,” Silver eyes darting here and there, as she felt nervous and hungry. Even the bar food looked like heaven. ‘Lost so much weight, smells so good, even those damn sweet fruits look good.’ Her mind wandering till the the barkeep spoke to her, “ ‘ere for tha job?” Zakai gently nodding her head before his deep voice caught her attention again, “Well little scrawny for a table girl, but I guess you’d do in pinch.” She didn’t know if she should feel insulted or at least relieved she had a way to make money and eat.  
  
The work was simple, bring the food and drinks to the customers, get the tip and payment for it, and repeat that thirty to one hundred times a night. Learning to listen to the traders, mercenaries, bounty hunters, and other seedy people of the galaxy. She wanted out of this job and into something more honorable and less likely to have her ass grabbed by the drunken Besalisk. All she needed was the right crew to sign up with.


	3. A New Line of Work

They came in every two weeks like clock work. A male human, female Zabrak, two twin male Chiss, a Jawa, and the biggest brute of a Trandoshan she had ever seen. Always they talked about the good hunt they just got back from, always she took their table.   
  
That night the woman pulled Zakai into her lap, while the human talked to her. “You’re Echani right? You can read people by how they move right?” Zakai wasn’t comfortable with this closeness of the woman Zabrak, nor the questions of the man sitting in front of her. “I need to get back to work.” The man seemed annoyed, like he had paid for her attentions.   
  
Those bright silver eyes darting over to her Besalisk boss, almost pleading with him mentally to call her over, give her a new task, anything, just to get away. But he did not. Resigning to the fact she would have to answer these questions. “I can read people, yes.” She watched the man’s posture shift, she felt the fingers of the woman run through her long silver hair. Zakai was calculating her odds at the moment, calculating if she could escape or kill him. He picked up on it, chuckling, “You can’t do it, beautiful. I’d hate for Ew Vli to have to ruin that pretty face. Now then, you can’t be making that much here.”  
  
Listening, she kept feeling the woman’s fingers in her hair, it was becoming annoying, she wasn’t her pet, nor had she submitted to the affection. Before the tray hit the floor, Zakai had moved grabbing the Zabrak’s hand. When the tray hit there was a sharp snap as she broke one of the fingers of the Zabrak. In the expanse of a few moments, the Trandoshan had moved in, Zakai hearing the click of the safety going off and she felt the cold metal barrel pressed to the back of her head. The human began laughing, while the Zabrak was silently holding her hand. “Ew Vli, relax. Kamaxa looks fine, an hour or less in a kulto tank she’ll be fine. Let our little friend here go.”  
  
That’s when she had given away her skills and she knew what the man wanted, her skills in combat and her ability to read people. He wasn’t going to leave with out her in his grasp. She now belonged to his crew. But the strange moment she didn’t care, it meant better pay, and ways to learn more, ways to get herself back home.


	4. A Year is Nothing

It had almost been a year into working with this crew. Working under the human, Germar Reddman, was hard but rewarding. He pushed he to be better, keeping her close to him unless the target needed to be taken care of silently. The tension between Zakai and the Zabrak, Kamaxa, never died down. The two women always seemed to be at each others throats. The twin Chiss entertained Zakai, always trying to snatch her attention, or trying to see if they could get her to guess wrong on who was Taza'wul'lisdin or Tozo'duosha'giamei. The last two crew mates were nice enough to her, the Trandoshan, Ew Vli and the Jawa, Kleepom Thejikth. This was her family, at least that is what she thought till the night she lost something precious to her.  
  
The crew were all gathered around the table eating and drinking, it was normal table banter till Germar looked at Zakai. She had seen this look a few times from him, mostly at her and Kamaxa, plus a hand full of women at bars. “You enjoy a good roll in the sack?” The question caught Zakai off guard, she was trying to figure out the emotion or hidden context in his words and actions. Pretending to shove in another bite as she mulled over the question.   
  
“Come on, Zai. Taza really wants to know too,” laughter from the Chiss till his brother clocked him in the shoulder. “Shut up Tozo!” Zakai shook her head at the pair, they could be cute and sweet when they wanted. Swallowing her mouthful, she took a drink and cleared her throat. “Yeah, everyone else dose, why wouldn’t I?” Sitting back she threw the question back at Germar, she was seventeen, the most she had been around the opposite sex like this was with them.   
  
Watching Germar’s posture shift again, he sat up and leaned back into his chair, this smug look on his face as he stared at Zakai. He had this hunger in his eyes, something she had never seen before, even Kamaxa’s posture shifted. The way the woman was staring at Zakai was with so much contempt, hate, and jealousy.   
  
It wasn’t till later Zakai understood what he was talking about. He had taken advantage of her naivety, her innocence lost to someone she would have never given it to had she understood what he wanted. She drank, to drown the pain. Something the others noticed. Kamaxa made it worse, the snide looks that let on she knew she was better than the lonely Echani. Something that served to further her deeper descent.


	5. Those Pretty Little Lies

Pretty little lies we tell ourselves to get through the day. I still care, It was fine, I am fine, it was my fault. Passing the bickering Taza and Tozo, she didn’t even look at them, or more like she really couldn’t look at them. Her face hurt and was a little swollen, unsure why as she stumbled through the ship to the refreshers. What she did remember of that night was drinking with the two of them plus Ew Vli, which was always a bad idea as both twins tended to probe out the competitive side of Zakai out.  
  
Stepping into the refresher she stared at her face, at the thick black lines on her face, quickly it flashed before her bits and chunks of her night out. Hearing Taza and Tozo come in, Tozo walking up behind her and wrapping his arms around her waist. “They still look hot, Zai. Your little story about them was sweet, made Taza cry a little.”   
  
Pushing him off she growled a little, she didn’t want to be touched anymore, a side effect from telling herself lie after lie after lie. Tozo said a few words in Cheunh to Taza before addressing Zakai, “What’s wrong with you? You were fine with sitting in my lap last night now all of the sudden you don’t want the attention?” Zakai ignored him, it was becoming easier and easier to shut the world off. The Twins got it, she was done talking to them, they left silently talking back and forth in Cheunh.  
  
Sighing as she splashed fresh water on her face, it stung slightly but not enough to put her off. Gently patting her face dry, she heard boot steps behind her, but no one touched her. “They look good on you, White.” Zakai’s mind shifted, she had to become numb, “Thanks, Germar. Twins talked me into last night over drinks.” That chuckle he gave would have sent shutters down her spine had she not been in control of herself. Setting the towel down on the sink, she saw him through the mirror.   
  
Heavy boot steps moved closer as the man wrapped himself around her, softly nipping at the crook of her neck. Zakai’s grip on the sink tightened as she growled at him, “Let go, Germar. Now.” Her voice sharp and filled with venom, as she was trying to not just turn around, grab the blaster pistol at his hip…  
  
Then it was too late, he didn’t let go of her. Zakai quickly turned in his arms, hand reaching for the blaster pistol in one fluid motion she drew it, then shoved the barrel under his chin. “Kindly go fuck yourself, Germar. Now back the fuck off.” More of his chuckling, she was starting to loath that sound, but he released her and walked off, “Too bad, White, could have been fun for another round.”  
  
It was in that moment Zakai knew she had to leave, to get away, to find her own way.


	6. Zakai[ArtWork]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Artwork by Rantourus. You can find more of my work on my Tumblr of the same name. Thanks!


	7. So This is...

Zakai stared at the twins, Tava and Tovo staring back at her. They rushed her quickly both wrapping themselves around her as they saw the pack on her back. She would be lying if she didn’t say she had become attached to them, kissing their cheeks she sighed, “I will miss you both. Take care of yourselves. Don’t let them kill your souls. And I knew who was who every time. Tovo has the smallest delay in things.” Ew Vli hissed at the display and the twins who were clinging to the Echani woman like brothers loosing a sister, “Pathetic,” his voice hissed out.  
  
Once she was released from the twins, she walked over to Ew Vli, “Going to miss your ugly face too.” The Trandoshan’s laugh was harsh and more like a clicky hiss noise, “Yesss, Zai. Your face iss equally dissssgusting.” Zakai shook her head, “Take care of yourself. Don’t have to regrow any limbs or organs.” She roughly patted his shoulder before stepping out of the hanger, there was no looking back now. Time to head forward, time to head for the Bounty Hunter’s Guild and start working for herself.   
  
The next few months were hard, she was glanced over numerous times, her age, sex, whatever was off putting about her. The few jobs she could pick up were spent on scrapping together the credits for her first ship. But even then she fought hard for jobs and clients. Within the following year she was again leaner for lack of proper nutrition and sleep, but she had enough to buy better armor.   
  
Stepping into the shop she looked at the male Twi’lek, trying to read him on his mood and willingness to part with things for a cheaper price. Though it was a toss up she took her chance. “Looking for armor, need to upgrade from heavy clothing.”   
  
The Twi’lek looked her over, “The only thing I have that will fit is that over there.” He pointed to a beat up laminate and leather set with an enclosed helm. The laminate was miss matched in color, which she could deal with or fix later on, the leather looked good enough. ‘I could pad it, give myself a new guild title. No one would have to know who or what I was.’ Glancing over to the Twi’lek she sighed, “How much? And do you have any mods?” The Twi’lek gently scratched his chin, seeming to mull it over, but Zakai picked up it was a ruse and narrowed her eyes.  
  
“Two Thousand Credits.” Zakai scoffed, “That better come with a repaint and voice modulator and a few other new toys. Five Hundred, as is. Plus if you have a voice modulator, I’ll pay for that.”   
  
“One Thousand.”  
  
“Seven Hundred.”  
  
“Eight.”  
  
“Seven Fifty.”  
  
“Deal.”  
  
Zakai smiled more, “That mod we spoke about? That is included, yes?” Watching the Twi’lek nod she smirked, “Good.” Collecting her trinkets and paying she headed back for what she called home. Time to start work and that double life she would come to love.


	8. What’s in a Secretary?

Zakai quietly sitting in a small cafe on the upper tiers of Coruscant, hair braided wrapped and just about perfect. Slender fingers expertly using her chopsticks as she silently read over a holonovel. Eyes darting to the holomessenger as it lit up, delicately setting down the datapad she answered it.   
  
“I am looking for Kai-Kas.”  
  
Zakai sat up better, “This is Kai-Kas’ secretary, how may I help you?” Simple sweet, as she began to pay attention, you only contacted Kai-Kas when you had work for him.   
  
“Yes, I need to hire him for a task. I need some trash taken out, I will send full details in a data transfer. Ten thousand credits.”  
  
Raising a brow, she sighed, “Please send it over and I will make sure Kai sees it. I will contact you back with in twenty four hours with a yes or no. Anything else I my help you with?” But there it was, the click and dead silence, she disliked that. Treating her poorly was never a good way to start things. Picking up her chopsticks she finished her meal then would head for her ship, it was time to go to work.  
  
 _The Tattooed Lady_  
  
Smiling as she trailed her hand across the hull, silently tapping in the code to the ship she stepped back as the gangplank extended with a hiss. Heels clacking against the metal as she walked up the plank and once inside she sealed the ship behind her. Heading for the cock pit to look over this information, she sighed, it wasn’t there. Frowning a little, she was now annoyed she had rushed home to look over this damned info and nothing was here. Tapping her manicured fingernails on the console she was angry, she didn’t like her time being wasted, maybe she should track the caller and…  
  
There was a knock on the ship, raising a brow, she made her way back to the gangplank, looking at the some vidscreen at the inside keypad she raised her brow again. Pressing the outside com she watched the man holding an, was that an envelope and a small black box? “Zakai speaking, how may I help you?”  
  
“I have information about a job you were recently contacted about.”  
  
Curiouser and curiouser, pressing the lock code again, she kept her eyes on the man. “My employer is not in at the moment, but you may leave the information with me.” Stepping down the gang plank was the moment she began looking the man over more. Dressed in a nice suit and tie, he was a little taller than her, and a slender form. His long hair pulled back into a single braid, blue eyes, dark tan skin, not bad on the eyes at all.   
  
“The box is for you, the paperwork is for Kai-Kas.”  
  
The voice was different, that much was sure, was he using a voice modulator over the comms or was this a proxy like she used herself. Taking the box and the envelope, she smiled, “Thank you. I’ll be sure Kai reads this over and gives a response quickly.” She watched him give a small bow and then leave, had she wanted she could have thrown herself at him and had a fun time, but work came first.   
  
Back in the cockpit she opened the envelope and looked over everything. Brow raising a few times as she looked over the detail of the plans and information at her finger tips. Moving on to the box, she opened it, inside was an expensive necklace and earring set, something she wouldn’t be able to buy unless she saved for a year. Also inside the box was a hand written note, ‘I know, you do not have to pretend with me. Mr. X’. That whole phrase sent a shiver down her spine, looking at the comm number on the paperwork, she debated about not taking the job, but the jewelry and the easy credits were to much for her to pass up. Entering in the numbers, she waited for someone to answer.  
  
“Ahh Zakai, I see you liked the job and the present, yes?”  
  
Softly laughing she shook her head, “Yes, I did. I really don’t want to know how you know, or who you know. I just wanted to inform you I was taking the job and I look forward to more work.” The man’s voice on the other side was calm and cool, she almost trusted it, shaking her head, she rubbed her temple and then ended the call. Let him see how much he liked it done to him.


	9. No, Really I am Just a Secretary

Stepping into the luxury speeder craft, it was nice of her employer to loan her the thing. It had heated seats, good glorious gods this was perfection, just like her dress, hair, and the jewelry around her neck. Hair braided and pinned up in a tight bun with her chrome durosteel chopsticks. Silently sipping a glass of some expensive alcohol, this is the life she wanted, twenty one years old and now set on having this life for herself. ‘Oooo there are snacks as well…’ Her mind purring over the fact that there were sweets, finger foods, and even sushi. Smirking this client knew her habits, he likes, and her wants.   
  
Looking out the window as the speeder craft slowed down, the place was on the top tier of Coruscant, she had never been here. Staring at even the landing spot, she noticed it was lavish, two men waiting on the next speeder to land. The door opened and a hand was held out for her to grab, smiling she took it and stepped out with grace.   
  
“Are you alone, miss?”  
  
Zakai smiled and nodded gently, as he offered his arm to her, then she took it. Lord this was a dream as she seemed to forget her mission, her job and just float on air to this palace of dreams. Stepping into the parlor of the place she smiled more.  
  
“First time, miss?”  
  
Nodding again she listen to him talk about the owner of the home, the parties, everything a girl like her could ever want. “You should head into the ballroom, miss.” The voice pulled her back to the present, “Yes, I should, thank you.” Slipping her arm from the man’s she headed for the large double doors, she could hear the sound of the music, the people, the smell of food.   
  
The doors opening as she moved towards them, being pulled inward into the next room by one man on each side of the doorway, not that you could see them. Looking out over the room, she was dressed perfectly for this life, not to mention that she was the most exotic race at the party. Moving gracefully through the crowd, she stood at the railing that separated the dancers from her.  
  
Smiling even when a hand gently touched the small of her back, “Would you care to dance?” It was a voice like an angel, and she looked over to see her suitor for the moment. Those silver eyes finding a human man, who was smiling as he looked at her. “Those are enticing, your eyes I mean.” Smirking as he spoke, she took his offered hand, following his lead to the dance floor.   
  
Each step perfecting in tune to him, his grip on the small of his back tight enough to hold on but still delicate. This moment of a dream as the pair glided across the dance floor, flurries of spins and gentle dips to the pace of the music. She could have stayed this way all night, every night. As the music slowed he even pulled her in close, holding her in this warm gentle embrace. “Enjoying yourself, White?”


	10. Well Maybe I Lied

Pulling from the man quickly, she snapped back into the right mindset, the dream faded and she knew what she was to do now. She was on a job, she had a mission and here she was acting like a star struck little girl. Looking to the man she had been dancing with, he was speaking to her and she had ignored him. “I am sorry, someone use to call me white. He wasn’t very nice.” The gentlemen smiled and gently bowed her head, “I apologize.”   
  
He took her hand gently leading her off the dance floor and for one of the balconies, “Some fresh air, yes?” He was kinda and gentle, while Zakai became more guarded, but she followed along with him. “I am Graterr Sutnai, though you possibly already knew this. What might I call you?”  
  
‘Graterr Sutnai, that is the mark.’ Smiling she let him pull her close to the railing and even in his arms. “Aretri Ramscran.” A lie so simple so easy for her to just throw at him, something she had grown use to. “A lovely name for a lovely woman,” his fingertips gently brushing her cheek. She disliked these kind of jobs, getting close to someone, allowing them to touch her long enough for her to be close. Not to mention the cheesy pick up lines that men used.   
  
Quickly a joint laugh turned to silence as her chopstick pierced the back of his neck in just the right spot. “Goodnight, sweet dreams, and goodbye.” Shocked look on his face as his body went over the rail, Zakai quickly cleaned the chrome durosteel chopstick and replaced it in her hair. Slowly leaving the balcony, heading back into the ballroom to dance the night away. Knowing if she left now she would be tagged as suspicious and what better way to end a job but with a night of dancing.  
  
Back on her ship she yawned, spending the night out had been fun but tiring. Stumbling into the cockpit she flopped down in her chair, the comm light flickering on, causing her brow to raise. Fumbling to answer it, she groaned out, “Zakai, Kai is out. What do you want?” Chuckling, deep chuckling came from the comm, “It is Mr. X, I am pleased with your work, Zakai. You are getting a bonus, along with more work. Now off to bed, and I’ll send by the next selection of jobs later today.” She didn’t like how he knew what she was doing at all times, it creeped her to say the least. But at the moment she was too tired to care. Yawning one last time before heading for her bed, catching the chuckling again, but she didn’t stop because she knew he could hang up. All she cared about at the moment was sleep


	11. Counting, Always Counting

_731,289,600 seconds on her own._  
_12,188,160 minutes on her own._  
_203,136 hours on her own._  
_8,464 days on her own._  
_1,207.5 weeks on her own._  
_230 months on her own._  
_23 years on her own._

The harsh thoughts of the pale white woman thought as she stared out into hyperspace, silver eyes reflecting the stretched and blaster bolt like stars. A single tear forming in the corner of her eye as the time hit her. It still hurt, she could never use her own name, never use her weapons, wear her armor. Sixteen normal years of life, then it all came crashing down around her. Almost not caring that it was time to drop out of hyperspace, but she knew she had to. Stretching out her leg she nimbly hit the button with her toes, wiping the tear from her cheek. “Nashea Lusmunt,” that name feeling so foreign as she stared at her tattooed reflection in the duroglass.  
  
“Fuck you! Just FUCK YOU! THAT’S MY NAME! I was born with it, you have no fucking right to take it from me,” she felt her fist hit the durosteel plate on her console. Still so angry over what had happened, angry with herself, angry with her family, angry with her people. “I was SIXTEEN! I panicked! I was a child!” Staring at the worlds in front of her, eyes reflecting the anger she felt. Knowing she couldn’t go further than this, she could just stare at home, so close yet so very far away. Their faces still ingrained in her mind, the night terrors got worse and worse till she found it hard to sleep for more than a few hours at a time.

So much screaming and yelling and tears, she could taste the salt, the metallic taste of blood, the fading of life from the girl’s eyes, the way her body seemed to feel heavier as she grew colder, it was never something she could wash away. Stripping of her weapons, that wasn’t so bad, she was still a dangerous weapon even without that. Stripping her armor piece by piece, she had felt so naked, so vulnerable. Her name, her mother had done that, a slap in the face as she spoke the words, ‘You are no longer my daughter. No longer one of us. You are here by exiled and nameless.’ Those words were like her vibrosword slicing through her chest. Unsure of how to actually take those words, she had become angry, left on the next transport out to the largest planet she could find. That’s when all of her life started, sixteen and cast adrift in a large galaxy.

_23 years on her own._  
_230 months on her own._  
_1,207.5 weeks on her own._  
_8,464 days on her own._  
_203,136 hours on her own._  
_12,188,160 minutes on her own._  
_731,289,600 seconds on her own._


	12. Odd Jobs

Orders were simple, deliver and guard the delegate to Mandalorian space, simple open and shut job, or at least so she thought. Sighing under the helm she was bored on the ride there, playing sabacc with the other guard that was hired. Only really taking this job as a way to stick to any Mandalorian that gave her a chance to. She liked poking her race’s rivals, it gave her a thrill to conquer them not only in battle but other ways.  
  
“So ever take that ugly thing off?”  
  
Kai chuckled and shook her head, “Nope, it is a lot prettier than the mug under it.” Winning the hand she smiled under her helm, as the other began dealing another hand. It was a long and boring trip and one she would rather just fast forward to, only getting time outside of the armor when she was in the refresher and the door locked so she could relax and shower.  
  
When the ship landed, Kai was first off, carrying a weapon of her own design, for the moment it looked like a staff of some sort. Coming face-plate to face-plate of the Mand’alor she sized the being up, those silver eyes moving over the armor looking for weak points and ways to take him down if need be, but she was also reading his body talk. “All clear, ready to send the delegate,” simple words sent over the comms as her eyes never left the face-plate of the Mand’alor.  
  
The delegate bowed to the Mand’alor before speaking, “Thank you for receiving us. These are my escorts and guards for this meeting, if you do not mind.” Kai was staring her hand tightening and loosing the grip on the staff as she was calculating in her mind what she could do to disable the being if she had too. The Mand’alor didn’t speak or do much more than turn and motion them to follow. She was already less than amused with this being’s dismissal of their presence


	13. Odd Jobs But Fun Jobs

The talks were long and drawn out by the delegate, not that Kai paid any sort of attention to the words, her entire focus was the armor clad Mand’alor. ‘I will conquer you, wait and see.’ There were even points in time where she swore he looked at her, maybe stared, even though she couldn’t see a face or eyes under the helm.  
  
When the talks seemed to finally finished, the two bodyguards escorted the delegate back to the ship. They had to wait on a few things to clear, Kai asked about a bar as for the moment she could use a drink and where better to have some fun and maybe conquer a few of her enemies than a bar. Signing off with her partner she headed out.  
  
Stepping into the bar the noise seemed to stop, but she kept walking, head held high as she moved to the bar. You could cut the tension in the room with a dull spoon, but Kai seemed unphased by it. Taking a seat at the bar, she looked to the bartender, “What ever you serve I’ll drink.” She could feel the eyes, the words she didn’t understand but assume they were insults.   
  
It didn’t take long for them to loose interest in her, well most of them. Five, there were five, “Hey Aruetii.” What the hell did that word even mean, seeming to ignore the Mandos, she continued her drinking. “You don’t belong here.” Everything was fine until the one speaking put their hand on Kai’s shoulder, even with Kai trying to shrug it off, it didn’t give the message.  
  
The speed of which Kai moved was amazing even in the armor, she pulled and stabbed one of her throwing knives into the Mandalorian’s hip right between the joins in his armor. This would be the start of this fight, as she began trading blows and hits from the other four. It was a lengthy fight, with the bar erupting into cheers and boos at blows.    
  
In the end all that would be standing was Kai and rather than start more, she took her seat again and went back to drinking what ever the bartender had poured her.


	14. Oddly Fun Jobs Lead to Things

Kai was silent as she drank, the bar returned to chatter in a language she only knew bits and pieces of. The Mandalorians she had beaten slowly got up and left to what she figured was licking their wounds. Which was no skin off her back, not to mention she had the whole thing on holodisk now. Chuckling as she thought about it, she was enjoying her R&R, this drink, and the fight. She didn’t talk much to anyone as she knew how they felt about her, kept calling her that word she didn’t know. Rolling her shoulders, she was already feeling the fight, but that wasn’t going to sour her good time.  
  
Everything changed the second the crowd went silent. She heard the boot steps getting closer and closer, then the clank of armor against the metal stool next to her. She didn’t turn her head to look, she watched as the bartender set a few fruits, something that looked like a very large nut, two glasses, and a bottle of something in front of the Mandalorian sitting next to her. Slowly the bar went back to normal as the armored one silently cut and slice things apart. Slowly she began turning her head, unsure of what they were doing, watching the delicate work they did with their blade, it was poetic in a way to her. Putting this or that in the glass before pouring the thick liquid into the glass, it was interesting to say the least. When he slid a glass to her, she smirked, “This is something the old Mand’alor enjoyed, even enough he would take his helm off, said the filter straw gave it a funny metallic after taste.”  
  
Kai took the moment to ponder of if she should take her helm off, she was still on contract, still had to be Kai. Sighing, she picked up the glass and paused, “ Is this the point in the dance, where you tell me you poisoned him, but only after I pull my helmet off and take a drink, then I begin to question if you did the same to me?“ She took a drink through her own filter straw. It was interesting to say the least, sweet and intoxicating. Something she could come to like if she drank it enough, but he was right about the metallic after taste.  
  
"No, he was slammed into a durasteel pole until he died,” the flat matter of fact tone perked Kai’s interest for some reason, he had yet to take a drink and was talking to her like she was person. She was both intrigued and worried, picking her words carefully, “At least he was killed in combat, so that says something for your kind. I can respect that.” Smiling under her helm, she could respect him, even with him being a rival, she found it easy.  
  
"It either readies your fists or loosens your loins, kinda curious about what it does to you,” his tone was still slightly flat but there were hints of curiosity in the way he sat, slightly turned and leaned closer to her. Chuckling she shook her head, “Well a little bit of both. Part of me wants to grab you by the horns and beat you, but part of me wants to grab you by the horns and conquer you.”


	15. Things Often Lead to Other Things

Never seeing it coming as his boot kicked the stool out from under her, then in one swift motion he was up and looming over her as she hit the floor. Grunting as she hit the floor, she glared up at him, but also smiled. Getting to her feet in a swift agile motion even for being in restricted armor, she was ready. Hands reaching behind her and pulling the staff from her back, the devilish smile under her helm as she spun it once in her hands. “Finally, a real challenge.”  
  
Quick strikes her staff, almost always parried and deflected with his sword. Though a few landed on his knee but he seemed to take it in stride, this kept her interest in the fight, kept her wanting to beat him. A man who could take hits from her staff over and over again and yet still stand was, well it was a turn on.   
  
“Come on, a vibrostaff ? I’ve slain Jedi, you’ll have to try harder, Aruetii.”   
  
What was with them and that fucking word, growling softly, “ I am just warming you up. Wouldn’t want to best you under less than favorable conditions.“ Quickly she twisted and pulled the staff into two blades, this was when the fun started to her. Her attacks were fiercer, stronger and aimed to disable him rather than kill him. Having to remind herself she was on a job even if he attacked first, she didn’t need the added black mark on her Bounty Hunter’s Guild record. She was pushing him back, towards the door, the crowd parting and moving to watch. Cheers and boos again, not that Kai even cared at this point, this was exciting.   
  
She almost had him with his back against the door when she felt it, the pressure around her throat, a sharp gasp escaping. Didn’t even have time to react as she was lifted from the ground and tossed like a ragdoll across the bar. Groaning as she sat there against wall trying to gain her bearings. Force Users, had to be fucking Force Users. Watching him grab something off his belt and then it ignite into a saber, it kicked in her fight or flight response, and with Kai it was always fight. Getting to her feet again she growled, rolling her shoulders as she prepared herself for this, it was no longer about disabling him from the fight, it was about who was going to survive this encounter. And if it wasn’t her, she was going to give him the hardest fight of his life.  
  
Charging him, even though she was a lightly dazed from the hit against the wall she was able to just push pasted that with a good shot of adrenaline. When they clashed it was like watching two masters of the dance perform a very calculated dance. Each hit was countered or deflected in some manner, the dance would drag on till one of them tired or he used the Force again. Eventually he caught both of her blades, pressing close she felt like he was smiling at her, “Careful now.”   
  
Crack was the only noise she heard as his Beskar helm smashed into her Laminate. The pain that seared through her head as she again found the floor, though this time the pain of the hit caused her grip on her weapons to lax enough she dropped them. The hit had been hard enough it cracked and broke pieces of her helm. Sitting up, she was dazed, head bobbing and drifting as a thin line of red made it’s way down her forehead to her nose. "All four of you, stand still.” She kept trying to stand up, but she was too disorientated to get any father than some what sitting up. Still had fight left in her and she wasn’t going to give up, had to at least give her credit for that.


	16. And What do Other Things Lead to?

“Anade dayn!”  
  
Why did they have to speak something she didn’t understand, though it wasn’t hard to figure out as everyone seemed to file out of the bar. Growling as she felt his hand hoist her up, then the sound of a table being dragged across the floor. He set her on the edge of the table, she felt his fingers reach for the clip and pull off her busted helmet. Chuckling as he saw her face then pulling off her balaclava, “Echani with facial tattoos.” His thumb gently rubbing over the black ink on her cheek.   
  
“I still see like four of you,” her hands stumbling for his helm, she kept going when he didn’t stop her, pulling his helm off. Smirking as she slowly began to come back to her senses. “Hand holds.” She could feel his hand hunting for the release mechanisms on her armor, it amused her. Hand gently grabbing his horn and laughing softly, “They do make good hand holds.” It was that moment she felt his hardened lips pressed to hers, closing her eyes she let him have his victory.   
  
“You win, sadly all I can offer is Kai’s secretary as per her contract. I’ll fetch her.” Letting go of him she started pulling off her armor, revealing her slender form in her under suit. Watching him pull off his armor off, he was fit, handsome and more importantly he won the right to have her.    
  
“You know, I think this is just about the most exciting thing I’ve done in awhile,” he smiled at her, picking her up off the table and wrapping her legs around his waist, while his hands slipped around her waist and upper back. Lips soon finding her again for a brief moment.   
  
“Poor Horned Mandalorian leads a boring life. Are you at least enjoying yourself?” Zakai teasing him as she pecked his cheek and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling close to him.  
  
“Yes and you’re about too as well, Echani.“ He touched her cheek and slowly stroked the pattern that marked it before leaning in and kissing her with rough lips. Smiling as he did so, she would enjoy herself as he carried her off. Not that she argued with him as she kissed and nipped at him with him returning the affections.


	17. Zakai and Cander Kiss[Artwork]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Artwork by Rantourus. You can find more of my work on my Tumblr of the same name. Thanks!


	18. Terkriva!

Stretching and rolling to the edge of the bed, she smiled. She had slept through the night, it was a welcomed feeling. Yawning she slowly opened her eyes, nothing looked familiar, suddenly the pain of her head struck her. Rolling over in the bed she stared at the light redish skin of a man. He seemed to know she was awake, rolling over to face her he smirked, “Good morning, my wife.” The words completely caught her off guard and she fell out of the bed. “What?!” She didn’t even know how to respond as she laid back on the floor trying to pull together what the hell had happened last night. “I am sorry but, what the absolute fuck are you on about?”  
  
He moved enough to look down at her bare form, “We did that a few times too. Some where in the midst you asked how Mandalorians marry. I told you, and you replied we should do that. But we’ll have to talk later. Take a shower, order something to eat, and I’ll be back as soon as I can.” He handed her a datapad and showed her how to order in. Zakai looked at him, “Aren’t you hungry?”   
  
“Yes, but I am late.”  
  
She watched him dress from her position on the floor, it was nice to watch his body more and flex as he pulled on the armor of the… Her heart stopped as she realized who this was. Staring at him she begin laughing, like this was all some sort of cruel joke. She was sure he thought she was crazy as he seemed to ignore her and leave her alone.  
  
Glancing around she didn’t see any of her clothing, which panicked her. Slinking around the room, she sorted through his things before finding one of his robes. Pulling it on, it swallowed her form but it at least covered her. It was hard for her not to pry or give a thorough search.  
  
Waiting for her food to arrive, she had no clue what she had really ordered and she just hoped she could eat it. Her eyes drifting to the door as there was a knock, she seemed to slowly make her way like a cat moving close to something they are unsure of. Opening the door, she looked at the armor clad person and raised a brow.   
  
“Gar kai'tome cuyir olar.” Though from her blank expression he sighed, “Your food is here.”  
  
Opening the door she watched as he brought in covered trays, setting them down on a small table, and pulling the covers off to expose the food under it. Zakai looked at the food, it was pretty, sniffing she smiled a little. “What’s the word for Thank you?”  
  
“Vor entye.”  
  
Raising a brow she repeated the words a few times, “Vor entye?” The man seemed to chuckle, “Not bad for an Aruetii.” That word again, it now irritated her, “What in the hell dose that even mean? I have heard that every step of the way here, and it’s starting to piss me off.” Again with the chuckles at her, “Means outsider.” Smirking she nodded, “Well, thank you, and umm you are dismissed?”  
  
When he left she settled down to eat, reaching to her hair and nothing being there she sighed, “Well shit.” Sighing she didn’t have her chopsticks and she would have to resort eating with a fork.


	19. What if, is a Very Good Question.

Zakai sighed as she poked at the food on the table, if felt like she had been in this room for days. She kept glancing at the door like any moment he would open it and they could start this long talk. Constant shifts from the bed, to the chair, to the table, anything to keep herself entertained, even going as far as working out to try and stave off her boredom.   
  
Hours passed and she tired herself out, crawling back onto the bed she sighed, curling up and snuggling down with a pillow. Allowing herself to sleep she drifted off quickly, but soon her mind was filled with nightmares, tossing and turning in the bed. Her mind knowing how this ended, cold sweats, racing heart, tears of regrets. As she was about to jolt awake she felt it. It was warm and sweet, smelled like heaven. Slowly her eyes opened and there he was, his soft and steady breathing as he had wrapped his arms around her and held her close.   
  
“That’s my robe.”  
  
Zakai smirked and nodded, “I didn’t see my clothes and I didn’t think it was proper to answer the door naked.” Sitting up with him, she sighed, she found comfort in her kind’s largest rival. Relaxing into his arms she rested her head against his shoulder. Feeling like she could have stayed there the rest of her life, though she knew this was likely nothing more than a one night stand.  
  
“We need to talk, Zakai.” His voice was soft as he knew he had interrupted a nightmare. “I need to know if you intend to contest the marriage.”  
  
Sitting up she gently pulled from his arms and looked at him, “You’re serious? I don’t have to stay with you? I can contest this?” Tilting her head to one side, “What benefit do I get for staying? Do you even want me to stay?”  
  
Shaking his head, “Well for one you can work when and if you want. You get to live your life like a queen. Children if you wish.” He watched as the word children seemed to strike a nerve, raising a brow at the display but moving on. “If you stayed I wouldn’t have to fulfill a part of a treaty and I have no want to fulfill.”  
  
“So you need me, and payment is the good life?”  
  
“In simple terms, yes. You would have three months to contest the marriage. I would like to know now if you plan to though.”  
  
Zakai sighed, the offer was good, almost better than most jobs she got offered. “I don’t know. I don’t even know your name.” Looking to him, she was trying to read him, he was serious she could tell that much. He wasn’t playing with her, this was all business with him. “Can I have more time? I am not… I can’t… There is a lot I have to think about.”   
  
When he nodded to her, she slipped back into his arms, “I have nightmares. It’s been a long time since I have slept more than a few hours.” Why did she feel comfortable around him? Why could she just talk to him as if she had known him all her life? Sighing she closed her eyes almost hanging her head as she was thinking about so many things.   
  
“Canderous,” softly he kissed her check, “And that is still my robe, Echani.”


	20. Time Flies

Half way through these three months and it had been paradise for the exiled woman. He had sent for her ship and she had moved most of her things into their room. Every day had been filled with what ever she wanted, it was strange getting everything her heart wanted, well almost everything her heart wanted. Standing in their room she was going through clothing and nothing seemed to fit like she wanted.   
  
“You’ve gotten fat. Maybe cut back on your dietary intake.”   
  
All he was met with was a glare, “Ass.” Switching to her leggings she smiled at least they still fit, she could be happy with that. “Do you mind?” She could normally tie her own top back but at the moment she didn’t feel like it, she had been feeling sick most mornings and it tended to last through out the day. Smiling as he complied with her request then wrap himself around her softly kissing her neck.   
  
“You should get checked out. You’re constantly sick, while it could be you adapting to this place and life. I would rather be safe than sorry.”  
  
“Already have a check up scheduled,” her hand reaching up to caress his cheek as he gave her affection. “Do you have plans for the day? Or can I expect you back before I get back?”  
  
“I am heading off now, not sure when I will be home, but I am sure I will have needs.” Rolling her eyes at him she pushed him off and laughed.  
  
Sitting in the room alone listening to the woman’s voice ask her over and over again if she was ok. It sounded so distance to her as she was in shock, had she been any other color than pale she might have lost all color. It was the warm tear rolling down her cheek that brought her back, “Don’t tell anyone. Please. I… Just don’t” Getting dressed again, she slowly made her way back to the palace, though today she was heading for her ship. Last place to call home.  
  
In her ship she allowed herself to fall to pieces, she wanted to just climb into the cock pit and leave, runaway and hide from this, even though she knew she couldn’t out run this. Hiding here until she heard a knock on the durosteel door she was leaned against. Glancing to the screen she sighed, “I don’t want to talk right now. I am fine.”  
  
“We need to talk. They wont tell me anything. You haven’t been home.”  
  
Unlocking the door she headed through the cargo hold of her ship and into the common room/sleeping area. Sitting down on her old cot, she didn’t even look up at him when he stepped into the room and started pulling off his armor. “I do not deserve this. I don’t. I am a horrible person and you need to know what I have done. Why I can’t have this. Why this life has to stop…”  
  
She wasn’t making much sense as she rambled on about how horrible she was with out even stating why. Silence came when he sat next to her and pulled her close, running his fingers through her hair, gently kissing the top of her head.   
  
“Tell me.”  
  
“My exile is because I killed my charge and her ten year old daughter.” It was at this point the tears began to stream, as he silently listened still showing her affection trying to keep her calm enough she could let this out. “My nightmares are always the same thing. I was sixteen. I was given the task to watch this woman. Hashi Bonteh. Senia, her only child. It was late, I was doing final rounds before I was to be relieved. I heard a noise in the study, it was dark, I thought they had a weapon, I just acted.” She shuttered as she looked at her hands as if they were still covered in blood. “Someone, she, well… She grabbed my shoulder. I didn’t think. I just struck her. I held her in my arms. I watched the last of her life just drift away. She felt so heavy after she was cold and gone. I just… I can’t. I don’t. Please tell me to go away. Please send me away, Cander.”


	21. When You're Having Fun

“Why would I send you away for a mistake? You were a child in your own right.”  
  
"Because I shouldn’t be rewarded for my mistakes. I shouldn’t be given this life. I didn’t do anything to deserve it.” She wanted to pull away form his warm embrace, but she also didn’t. His presence was comforting, he seemed to chase away the nightmares, but she wasn’t sure that was enough.  
  
“You don’t have to do anything, sometimes things happen to people without cause and arguing against them won’t undo them.” He was still content to hold her close, kept stroking her hair as she talked. Remaining clam was easy for him, even with her tone trying to light a fire.   
  
"My family cast me out and here you are trying to pick up my pieces.” Her tone was more accusatory towards him, like he was doing something wrong by trying to make her life easier. By trying to show her he did care, she was attacking. The same thing that always landed her in spots like this. Fear for her bred violence in her.   
  
“Is that so wrong?”   
  
Sighing, “I don’t know. You… just… I enjoy your company, I forget Eshan exist and I feel like I am betraying my whole life’s work.” Taking his hand she held onto it tightly with both hands. She felt so lost at the moment, his question had thrown water on her fire, not completely smothering it but redirecting her thoughts. “Why do something you don’t have to?”   
  
“Because I want to?” The tone of his voice was off, like he was confused why she asked, like he was surprised she didn’t know. “Not everything needs to be an act of obligation.”   
  
“I want to ask why, but I also am afraid of that answer, Cander.” Closing her eyes she sighed, her thumbs gently rubbing across the back of his hand. “Everything I have done has only been the base want of going home. Everything but a choice I am making now.”  
  
Sighing he shook his head, “Care to be less cryptic?” Moving her legs over his thighs and scooting back on the cot so he could relax against the wall. Relaxing with her close to him, again kissing the top of her head.  
  
“I had plans to kill you, for my own gain. But now I can’t.” Silently she moved his hand to her stomach, looking up at him her bright silver eyes staring at him watching his reaction. “Because you gave me something I want more than my home.”  
  
"You’re pregnant,” his tone hinted at surprise but not a lot, as if he were expecting it but not this soon in their relationship. "Are you happy with this surprise?”   
  
Zakai gazed up at him, “I want to say yes, because it’s what you would want to hear.” Looking away from him she sighed. “I am happy for children. But this wasn’t the time I wanted. Not the place I am suppose to be.” Her tone was odd, like it was steeped in regret and want, but also a sliver of happiness. Feeling his hand move from her stomach to her chin to pull her back to him. Looking up at him she sighed.  
  
“Zakai,” he pressed his forehead to hers, “Nothing ever goes as we plan. We have to learn to adapt to obstacles in our lives.” Hand moving to gently hold her neck while his thumb stroked her cheek. “But I will be here to help you as best I can.”  
  
That comfort was what brought her closer to him, closing her eyes she smiled softly. She could be content with that. Soon they were laying down, her contently snuggled into his back, head laying on his arm. While his hand gently rubbed her stomach. It didn’t take long for her to drift into sleep, while he silently kept watch thinking about the new life that was about to start.


	22. The Little Things

Smiling as he wrapped her arms around her, pulling her back against his chest. One hand placed on the small bump of her abdomen, while the other held up a wooden box to her.   
  
“Its not a dress or a cake.”  
  
Smirking as she took it from him and opened it. It was a simple bone band with inserted gems, or at least what she thought were gems. Slipping it on her ring finger she looked at it more, her thumb gently spinning it around on her finger.   
  
“Kyber crystals, bone from the first beast we hunted together, and my time.”  
  
Turning her head towards him she gently kissed his cheek, “I know I said I didn’t even get a dress or even cake… But that was a joke, Cander.” Turning her attention back to it, she was seeing a side of him she wasn’t use to. Sighing contently she moved her other hand to his that rested on her belly, she was becoming use to this, finding a comfort in these embraces. “Thank you, Cander. I didn’t know you crafted jewelry. It is lovely,” smiling like he had just given her the most expensive wedding ring in all of the galaxy.   
  
“I was worried it wouldn’t be enough.”  
  
That was the second she pulled away from him, “Were you judging me? That my love of fine dresses, shoes, jewelry, would make this mean less?” She was hurt and it showed. Staring at him as if he had just slapped her. “Those are things I could replace at the drop of a hat. I could call a store on Corusant and have it within the week.” Moving closer to him, hand softly caressing his cheek, “This I can’t replace. You put your hearts into this for me. To give me something when you thought I was upset about a stupid dress… or stupid cake.” Pecking his lips she sighed, “Granted the cake would have been nice…still would be.” Smiling at him she reached up grabbing one of his large horns and pulled his forehead to hers, “But I love this ring, Canderous, and I deeply care for you.”  
  
“But you wont say it.”  
  
She understood what he was on about, sighing she closed her eyes. “I can’t. I can’t say those words to you. It means giving up twenty three years of work, throwing it away. I can’t let go of all of that. It would be like me telling you to give up your hold as Mand’alor. Please, my horned king, please understand.” Listening to his hard sigh, then feeling his hand pull hers away from him she sighed. As he left her side she understood she hurt him, which was the last thing she wanted, but she didn’t want to hurt him more later. Hearing the door shut, she opened her eyes, looking for him but he was not there. “I don’t want to hurt you…”


	23. Sometimes Break

Moving to his side of the bed and laying down, snuggling into his pillow, before shifting enough she could look at the ring on her finger. Sighing she should have said she loved him, but she wasn’t sure she did or if she did how much, it was all one potential giant can of worms she was too afraid to open.   
  
Drifting into an uneasy sleep, she had grown use to him being in bed with her. Struggling against some force in her dream, mumbling and trying to push someone off that wasn’t there. This was about the time that he slipped back into bed with her, trying his best to ease her nightmare, pulling her close, softly kissing her cheek, whispering it was ok. Slowly she began to settle into his embrace, whimpering rather than mumbling, clinging to him rather than pushing him away. Rolling in his embrace she nuzzled her face into the crock of his neck.   
  
“I’m sorry,” the words barely a whisper as she desperately clung to him. Even with his silence he was still warm to her, still sweet. “I want to say things to you but I can’t. They aren’t just words.” She would have gone on had he not pulled back from her a little and placed a finger over her lips. Sighing as she was silenced, nodded in understanding he didn’t want to talk about this for the moment.   
  
“I love you. I didn’t think I would ever love someone.”   
  
Silence passed between them as she was unsure how to respond to that statement. His confession had again shocked her, knowing he was sweet and kind to her, but also knowing the tales of Mandalorians as a hard people. Feeling his hand rub up and down her back she relaxed more, allowing herself to listen to the sound of the double beat of his hearts, which kept her relaxed.  
  
“Love is always patient and kind. It is never jealous. Love is never boastful or conceited. It is never rude or selfish. It does not take offense and is not resentful.“  
  
Laughing a little it was again a shock, and this time she couldn’t hold it in, her laugh was the first reaction to him reciting mush to her. “I didn’t know warlords repeated mush and sonnets of love.” Another soft laugh till she heard him growl at her. Pulling back from his she stared at him in the dim light of their bedroom, raising a brow at him. The light making the expression on his face and his tattoos look more terrifying than normal when she said something that got under his skin.  
  
“Those who separate their warriors from their scholars are damned to have fools planning their wars and cowards making their laws,” his tone more of a snarl than normal.   
  
Knowing she struck a nerve but unsure of why her comment angered him, she shifted in his embrace, softly planting her lips to his for a moment. Watching his face ease and relax she slowly pulled her lips millimeters away from his. “Forgive me, My Horned King. I didn’t mean to upset you.”  
  
Sighing he pulled her closer and pressed his forehead to hers, closing his eyes. “I will always forgive you, My Dear Echani.” Allowing himself to relax and allow them both to drift into sleep.


	24. Growing Pains

“No.”  
  
“I do not care.”  
  
“Not getting out of this bed till they come out.”  
  
“Nothing fits.”  
  
“Your penis is not clothing, ass.”  
  
Zakai was hiding under the blanket in their bed, groaning about not having a thing to wear, even feeling him climb back into their bed she didn’t poke her head out to see him. Feeling his hands and arms wrap around her, pulling her close she growled at him, “No.” Hearing his chuckle in her ears she sighed, “Nothing fits, Cander. Already huge and nothing fits. I don’t want to go shopping. Don’t you have work to be doing?” She was crying by now, upset and hormonal were never good combos. Feeling him gently stroke her belly and kiss her bare shoulder she snuggled back into him.   
  
“Then stay in bed. I’ll make sure you are brought what ever you could need.”  
  
Zakai could handle that, not leaving the bed today, pulling back the blanket from her face as he pulled himself away from her. Smiling softly as he moved around feeding her much needed and wanted attention.   
  
“I’ll be back in a few hours. Will you be alright for that long?”  
  
Moving the back of her hand to her forehead, “I don’t know how I will go on without you,” her tone sarcastically over dramatic. Though she smiled some when he kissed her and then her belly. She didn’t want him to go, she wanted to pull him back into the bed with her and just curl up with him. Sighing she snuggled back down and tried to sleep more. The sleep came but was still an uneasy sleep.  
  
Somehow during her sleep, she had moved to the floor, created a small pallet on the floor. This was the scene Cander walked in on, chuckling as she looked like a cat curled up in a mess of blankets, pillows, sheets. He almost didn’t wish to wake her up, but he had something for her.   
  
“It’s time to wake up, my love.”  
  
Zakai stirred and yawned as she shifted under the sheet, watching him as he got down on the floor with her, handing her a box. Shifting enough to sit up she opened it and looked at the blue fabric in the box, frowning a little she wasn’t sure what he had brought her. Pulling it out she smiled, slipping in on she looked at it. The shirt was not her color and it was a little bigger than she needed, but at the moment she didn’t care. Moving she laid back against him, yawning again. “It is perfect, you are perfect…” Voice drifting in and out as she slipped back to sleep.


	25. Sometimes Old is Gold [NSFW]

The hot water felt great, she had never known that pregnancy was going to be this tiring and sore. Not hearing the door of the refresher open, the sound of the water from the head of the shower was dulling her senses. Forehead gently resting against the wall under the shower head, forearms pressed against the wall above her head. Closing her eyes she breathed deep and relaxed, letting the hot water melt the world away.   
  
Smirking when she felt strong hands grasp her hips, then the warmth of his chest to her back, “Hello, horned one.” Voice soft as she moved to straighten up only to be met with resistance and gentle push back.  
  
His hands caressing her belly for a moment, before gliding up to her breast while his lips found her shoulder and hunting for her neck. Nipping and soft bites coming from him, while his hand softly teased her breasts. Enjoying the soft whimpers coming from her as he found her neck, smiling with each roll of her hips against him.   
  
“Don’t move, Echani.” A dominate rumbled in his voice as he ordered her to stay still. Binding without a rope was new for her, but being bound in moments like this by him was not. Bristling with excitement as he spread her legs a little more with his foot. While his lips kissed and nibbled her neck, a hand glided back down her body and squeezed her rear before a quick slap to it.   
  
Sharp gasp as she felt him, feeling of his other hand slide down her body before the warmth of his chest left her back, allowing the water to rain back down on her back. Hands on her hips as the sound of skin against skin was muffled by the sound of the water raining down on them.   
  
Each gentle thrust was like heaven, often times she had been too uncomfortable for these sweet embraces from her partner. Biting her lower lip as she just simply enjoyed their moment together, knowing they would have less of these moments once the twins were here.  
  
It was romantic to her as they built to that climax and crossed the threshold together. Panting as she felt her knees buckle, but his arms were there to catch her, pulling her back to him. Turning in his arms to face him, softly pressing her lips to his while her arms wrapped around his neck. “Thank you.”  
  
He picked her up, stepping out of the shower and then using the force to open the door to their bedroom. Carrying her to their bed, even though he had a full day of meetings, dealings, and overseeing a few worlds, he planned to leave it for the day. Spend it with the woman whom had tamed his heart and gave him things he did not know he wanted.


	26. Tender Moments

Laying in their bed she yawned softly. It had been a wild few days, the rush of having them, to the few days sitting in a hospital bed to go over them inch by inch till everything was cleared for them to go home. But now she was home able to relax and enjoy the time she got with the Twins and Cander.   
  
Watching as he gently plucked Kessy from her arm and cradled her so protectively. Giving her the chance to move Emroc and adjust herself to be more comfortable. Settling in as she laid on her back, Emroc laying on her chest and that’s when she caught it. Humming, looking to Cander she focused on him. Watching him softly kiss her forehead then gently rock with her in his arm while his other hand was free to hold her tiny little hands.   
  
Staring at him she smiled softly listening to him speak in hushed tones about how she will be a beautiful woman and an even better Mandalorian. Watching his eyes light up as she made soft sweet noises and snuggled into his arms. When he turned his back to the bed and looked out at the world view they had, it was then she knew it.  
  
She felt it, she wanted to say it. Without words she mouthed the words, ‘I love you.’ Because in this moment she knew it, she loved him and had no want to let go of these feelings.  
  
When she started crying the look of panic on his face as he turned around towards her, quickly closing the distance to their bed and climbing into bed with her. The pair trading children as Zakai quieted Kessy with a feeding.   
  
“Are you happy?”  
  
Looking at him she smiled softly, reaching her free hand to gently caress his cheek, her thumb stroking across his cheek. “Very. I have never been so happy, my horned king. My Cander. My riduur<Husband>.” Something was different as she scooted carefully not to disturb the twins. Grasping his horn she pulled him close to kiss him, then allowed his forehead to rest against hers.   
  
This is all she needed now, what this room held. What he held, what she held, all of it. “We are one together. We are one when parted. We share all. We will raise warriors.” Watching his face light up as she repeated the vows again she smiled softly, pecking his lips. “I am sorry I cannot repeat them to you in Mando’a.”  
  
Hearing his chuckle she smiled more, snuggling in closer and shifting Emroc to her abdomen so she could be tucked close to Cander. While she drifted to sleep, he stayed awake, watching his children and the woman who tamed him continue to soften him.


	27. Sometimes They Come Back

He found her in the shower, it wasn’t even on. Bare on the floor sobbing over something. Cold and sweaty, as his finger delicately touched her shoulder. That was when she struck him, staring at him in a panic as she had caught him in the knee. “Cander?” Seeing the look of shock on his face, she scrambled to him as he sat up. Climbing into his lap she pulled his arm around her, burying her face into his bicep as she continued to sob.  
  
He adjusted enough to sit without the need of support with his other arm. Softly stroking her back, unsure what was really going on. She had handed the twins over to nanny for a few hours so she could rest and he could get things done.   
  
“Zakai?”  
  
Shaking and quivering in his lap, mumbling about things and the twins. It didn’t take him long to figure out she had a nightmare. Scooting to the wall with her her, he rested his head against hers and sighed.   
  
“You and our children are safe. Shhhh…”  
  
Unsure for how many hours they sat on the floor of their refresher, while he just held and comforted her as best he could. While she talked herself down, talking about what had happened in her dream.   
  
“I killed them… my sweet joys… I murdered them… worst still… You didn’t care, Cander. YOU didn’t even care!”   
  
His hearts sinking as she spoke the words over and over again as if she was trying to make sense out of terror. All he could do it keep petting, holding and kissing her. Feeling hopeless as there was nothing he could do to fix her, nothing he could to help her other than just sit with her.  
  
Slowly the mumbling and fidgeting stopped, glancing to see, he smiled seeing her asleep again. Getting up was not easy but he managed, carrying her back to the bed. The nanny stepping into the bedroom only to excuse them for being late.  
  
“Can you keep them longer?”  
  
With the silent yes, he smiled getting Zakai into bed then climbing in with her. She clung to him as if he was going to disappear from her side at any moment. Though this allowed her time to relax and rest, which he could tell she desperately needed.   
  
Waking up a few hours later, she looked at him, pushing away from him she sprang from the bed to check the crib not seeing them sent her into a panic. “Where are they?!”  
  
“With the Nanny. I asked if they would keep them longer. I found you in the refresher naked and crying.”  
  
Taking a deep breath she crawled back into bed with him. slipping back into his arms. “I had terrible dreams. I murdered our children… You walked in and pretended as if nothing was going on. Walking through their blood like it was nothing. I..” He stopped her with a finger to her lips.   
  
“Hush. It is over now.”


	28. Lullabies

_The moon will affect the tide_  
_More than the sun_  
_And you will affect my mind_  
_We will be one_  
_Making me high_

_Your waves of energy_  
_A current pulling me_  
_You are my moon_  
_My personal moon_

_The moon is my guiding light_  
_Filled by the sun_

_I follow the moon at night_  
_It leads me home_  
_Making me high_  
_Pulling me closer_  
_Making me high_

Rocking Kessy in her arms as she paced the floor, Cander watching from the bed enjoying the sound of her singing. Sighing as Emroc was fast asleep in the crib while Kessy had been fussy most of the night, even with Zakai singing nothing seemed to stop her. Glancing as she saw him get up, then seem to just come take Kessy from her.  
  
“Relax, I’ll try.”  
  
It seemed like the second he had her she quieted, causing an exasperated sigh to escape. “I hate you.” The words rolling off with sarcasm, before she slipped her arms around him, pressing her cheek to his back. Yawning softly she nuzzled her cheek into his bare back, smiling softly. She was happy to be sharing these moments with him. Closing her eyes she was starting to nod off when he moved, jerking her back into awareness.  
  
“Go lay down, my queen.”  
  
Smirking she pecked his shoulder then headed for the bed. Slumping into the bed she took a deep breath, relaxing into the scent of him. Smiling as she felt him wrap his arms around her waist. Snuggling close she yawned softly, intertwining herself with him.  
  
“You should sing more often. I enjoyed it.”  
  
Laughing a little, she pulled his arms tighter around her and settled in. Enjoying the soft pecks to her neck and shoulder. Slowly drifting off into a deep sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did not write the song, but with the lore that the Echani worship the moon. The link below is the song.
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZwFLkdNhhJk


	29. Those First Moments

He had rushed home, leaving in the middle of some clan meeting because he wanted to be there in that moment with her, with his children. “Did I miss it?” He was huffing for air as he started pulling off his helm to see it.  
  
Zakai smiled and looked up at him, “Not yet. Didn’t the Twelve have you in meetings all day?” Watching as his brow furrowed she sighed, “You left in the middle? I told you I would record them. Cander, they already hate me.”  
  
Falling silent as he waved his hand in a dismissive movement then turning back to Emroc as he struggled to get to his feet. Smiling as she watched him cling to the chair before letting go of it to try and make it towards Cander. Who had now stripped of most of his armor and was on his knees. The look of excitement and happiness on his face as his son took quick and shaky steps. Watching as the massive warlord melted as he caught the little boy in his arms and pull him close.   
  
Moving over to them she smiled kissing the bald head of her son and resting her cheek against her husband’s arm. “My sweet prince and horned king.” She only took a few moments to love on both of them before turning her attention to Kessy who seemed more than content to sit there and watch them.  
  
“Come on love, get up and come to us.”  “Come on, my pretty princess.”  “You can do it. Emroc can, so can you.”  
  
Kessy merely crawled to them and into her mother’s lap. Zakai sighed and pulled her close, “You should get back, handsome. They will at least be understanding.”  
  
“They can hang. This is more important.”  
  
Laughing softly as she stroked Kessy’s hair, snuggling close with her and leaning against Cander. She liked it when he chose them over his people, but she also felt like it could go bad for not only him but his family. Glancing up at him a moment she smiled before her getting to her feet and snatching Emroc. Taking them to their playpen she smiled, giving them time to play and develop, while she moved back to her love.  
  
Straddling his lap she wrapped herself around him, softly pecking his cheek. “I worry. I know they do not like me but tolerate me for the fact I am the mother of your children. I like our marriage is just between us, but I still worry about what I do to your standing.”  
  
He smiled, as he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. “I know. I made the choice, Zakai. I want to be here for them as much as I can, even if it means I upset someone. They can wait over their wants of things. I can never get this moment back if I miss it.”  
  
Smirking as she was soon nestled into him, even as he got up with her clung to him. Soft kisses to his neck and up to his jawline as he took her to the bedroom, she knew where this was leading. “Are we trying for more? They aren’t even  three yet.”


	30. Are Always the Sweetest

Smiling as she leaned her back against his chest, she was slightly engrossed in a holonovel while his focus was on the playpen less than five feet away from them. They had enjoyed their time together and this impromptu off day. His arms wrapped around her, while his hand rested on her belly, thumb gently stroking the bare flesh.  
  
“Dad-da.”  
  
Silver eyes looking up from the screen and staring at where the words came from. “Did… no.. I am more-” Her words cut off as again the word dad-da was heard again. tossing the pad aside she moved from her King’s lap and cautiously stalked towards the playpen. Sinking down to her knees she looked at Kessy and watched her with a rather intense look.  
  
“No Dad-da.”  
  
Chuckling he joined his mate next to the pen and looked at his daughter, “I think they love me more than you.”  
  
Zakai rolled her eyes, “Yes, because the one who is never telling them no is the better and more loved parent.” Her tone was bitter, she was upset that her children prefer him over her. Standing up she sulked back to the couch watching as he loved on Kessy, played with her, rather jealous that he got more love at the moment.  
  
When he came back to her, he sank to his knees and lazily pinned Zakai to the couch, “You’re jealous.” Scoffing she looked away from him. “You’re being bitter, Zakai.” Another scoff that was met with a deep rumbled of his growl.   
  
“Emroc walked to you. Now Kessy is calling for you. What’s next you figuring out I am not the best.” So many times did her inadequate feelings surface for a few moments then disappear but this one was not retreating. Hearing his sigh she looked at him, that’s when his forehead pressed against hers.   
  
“Zakai,” he paused a moment to make sure he had her full attention, “You are the greatest wife, lover, mother, and partner I could ever have.”   
  
Feeling his lips against hers, she relaxed, pulling him close and wrapping herself around him. “Thank you, Canderous.” She felt wrong for how she had been, but it was never easy letting go those closest to you picked someone else over you. Closing her eyes she smiled, “I am sorry for my words.” Enjoying the way his arms felt as they wrapped around her waist and pulled her tight against him.   
  
“They are walking and talking, my dear. Pretty soon it will be combat training, armor making, boys and girls, marriages, and grandchildren.”   
  
A disgusted noise slipping past her lips as she growled at him, “She can date when she is thirty-two, married, and has two children. Until then she shall be locked in a closet and not allowed out.” Growling as she caught his chuckling he had said it to get a rise from her. “Ass.”  
  
“Yes, you have a nice one.”  
  
“Double ass.”


	31. Why Kings Don't Really Lead

And here it was after a nice relaxing day at a spa and shopping she was returning to her home. Hand opening the door with ease as she stepped in and looked around.   
  
“What the fuck are you on about, Canderous?!”   
  
Staring at what was not only a mess but from the looks of it a party in the worst way. Every mother’s nightmare was unfolding before her as she moved further into her home. Stepping over toys and weapons, pillows, blankets, trash, till she got to the common area. The two children asleep with Cander sitting on the sofa watching over them.   
  
“Shhh, they are sleeping.”  
  
Zakai’s anger was building but it was hard to yell at him with her two babies sleeping. Their faces covered in mess and looked like some form of sweets. Eye twitching as she watched him get up and walk over to her. About to let him quietly have it, she didn’t get much time.   
  
He had her in his arms and his lips to hers, almost as if he was trying to avoid her anger knowing just the right way to stop her. Picking her up some and taking her towards their bedroom. Nearly tripping her over the large fur rug on their floor.   
  
Pulling from him she growled, “I have never wanted to slap you before. But at the moment I might.” It wasn’t an idle threat her body language and posture said as much. “What happened? Who is cleaning this up? What were you thinking?”   
  
“It was fun. You missed the Baby Battle Dome of Death! The Clan heads liked it.”  
  
All she could do was stare at him, “What the absolute fuck are you on about?”  
  
“Baby. Battle. Dome. Of. Death.”  
  
“I have no words for you. None. Well,” She paused a moment looking at him, “I will be too tired to give you your gifts and more than likely be too tired to have sex too. Because I have to clean the house now. So I guess I’ll have to send them back and you can sleep on the sofa for a few nights.”  
  
“Zakai… That’s not funny.”   
  
“I am not joking, Canderous.”  
  
Hearing him sigh and stalk out of the room, she smiled the second the door shut. Shifting her attentions to the bags she had bought and changed into a few things then relaxed on the bed waiting till she heard Roc and Kessy were awake. Coming out of the bedroom she smiled scooping up her loves and holding them close. She was surprised seeing how much Cander had gotten done, smiling she looked over at him. “I think you are missing a cute frilly pink apron.”  
  
Hearing the growl she smirked setting the twins down and watching them toddle off towards their play area. While she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around his waist and rested her cheek against his back. “Thank you.” She wanted to remind him that she still cared about him and that she was less angry.   
  
Letting go of him she made a few calls over the comms, checking bounty boards, contacting one of the sitters she didn’t mind, and ordering in something for them to eat tonight. Allowing Cander to work she packed two bags for the twins, bathed them and got them ready to go for the night. She was preparing things to remind her husband she did think about him even when she was away from his side.   
  
Once everything was said and done she held the bag of food and smiled. “You ready, horned one?” Watching as his mood seemed to shift and he look around for the twins, then the slow devilish grin spread on his lips. “I thought so.” Leading him to their bedroom to show him the gifts she had gotten him and enjoy some alone time with him.


	32. What's a Hero to One...

Sitting under his father’s basic cot, the little reddish Zabrak watched and waited for things to go by. He had packed himself snacks, a stuffed, and a book. Not that he could read but the pictures were at least entertaining. Staying quiet he felt the ship take off, nearly losing his glass of juice and stuffed TaunTaun. Settling in quietly as the ship seemed to ease off throwing him places. For him this was fun, knowing that he wanted to be with his father more than he got to, and knowing this ship took him away often enough.   
  
After finishing most of his rations and looking at his book a dozen times the little prince slowly began to nod off, finding comfort in his toy. He wouldn’t wake up till after the ship had landed and the Horned King left to go to work.   
  
Yawning and rubbing his eyes as he crawled out from under the cot, stumbling towards where he could smell the scent of his father most. More yawning and stretching as he used the stuffed TaunTaun to open the door to the cockpit. Looking around and frowning as his father was not there, looking at the chair he slowly made his way over to see if one of the screens held the person he wanted most at the moment.   
  
Climbing into the chair and then the console he looked out the port side first and seeing nothing but smoke and fires. Frowning, his lower lip trembling as he was becoming afraid of what might have happened to his father. Scrambling for the starboard side to see if it was the same.   
  
Golden eyes sparkling as he saw his father’s armor in the fray of battle. While to him it was like watching a hero’s tale come to life, in reality, it was bloody and gruesome as the Horned King dove into his storm of rage and anger. The prince was starting down a path of idolizing his father like no other before him.   
  
Seeing him begin to head back towards the ship, he scrambled to make it to the door, falling and rolling a little, but coming out rather unscathed. Faithful stuffed TaunTaun held tight to his chest as he bounced with excitement to greet his father.


	33. ... A Villian to Others

Looking up at the armor-clad man that was his father, who was just filling the door frame and looking down at him in shock. A large smile set on his face even with the noise of the metal palm plates groaning from the pressure the tightening fist of the Horned King. Unable to contain his joy he rushed his silent and still father, clinging to his leg and excited yelling, “Daddy!”  
  
The Horned King was fresh from the battle, anger always boiling close to the edge but this act from his son cause it to go to a soft boil. He couldn’t be angry, couldn’t blame the boy but he could act, scooping up the boy and carrying him to the cockpit. Pulling off his helm and tossing it aside, trying to not waste time in getting home.  
  
When the pair arrived home, he never bothered to turn his comms on, he had no idea what had happened, or how Zakai was at the moment, no way of knowing the storm he was about to walk into.   
  
Watching him take a step into their home she saw Emroc being set down. While she was happy, excited and relieved to see her child, she was starting to make assumptions in her mind, the loudest one being he took Roc with him. Her eyes picking up small details even though his armor was mostly cleaned it was a quick job. Bits, her eyes narrowed at everyone she picked up, bits of blood, bits of flesh, bits of gore, and just enough to keep her thoughts focused on the fact he took him into battle.   
  
Feeling Roc’s arms around her leg and Cander close, she lost it, the sound of a cracking bullwhip was heard. Palm stinging from the force she struck him with, her breathing was labored and heavy like she had been working out for the past six hours. Jaw clenched tight as she stared him down, watching the reaction as it went from shock to anger.  
  
“Shem, come get my children. Do not bring them back till I tell you.”


	34. Sometimes Lovers Quarrel

Watching her retreat to their bedchamber he growled softly, jaw clenched as he was not sure exactly what had happened but knew this wasn’t going to be the end of it. He didn’t want his children to see this aftermath. She had never slapped him, he was shocked and angry, he had expected her to yell, he would have rather dealt with that. Looking to Kessy and Roc he couldn’t even give them a fake smile, asking an Aran to keep an eye on the twins for a moment so he could get out of his armor. He wanted to enjoy these moments with his children, as he was unsure what the outcome of this battle was going to be.   
  
Coming back to them he dismissed the guard for the time and settled in with the twins in the common area. Watching movies seemed easier on him at the moment, books and toys would require him to speak more, movies the two could veg in his arms and he could simply and silently enjoy them. He assumed Zakai was sulking from the display, but he knew it wouldn’t last long, his cheek still stung.  
  
Dark brown eyes glancing up as the Togruta woman walked in, he wasn’t normal even with his oldest friend, well more like a family member. Getting up he scooped up both children and silently made way for the door. Setting the twins down on the other side of the threshold,  he pressed his forehead to each of theirs and sighed. “Take care of them, we’ll talk later.” Standing up he avoided his normal goodbyes with Shem as he headed back in.   
  
Thud, the sound of his back hitting the floor as a leg sweep caught the back of his knees, then her weight on top of him as she began to attack him. Though her blows were easy to block he kept his anger under control, tempering himself to not hurt her even with her not pulling punches.  
  
Hurt, pain, and anger, not only had she been panicked with Emroc’s disappearance but now he hurt her with taking the twins from her. “Dar’manda son of a bitch! You took him! Took him to see you in your glory! Didn’t even think about how it could hurt him! Dar’manda son of a bitch!” She was screaming at him, the more he blocked and stayed silent the angrier she got. Switching her tactics on him she got him with a few cheap shots, showing him she was learning.   
  
Pushing her away with the force he growled getting to his feet, lifting her via the Force and holding her aloft, even as she struggled and fought him. “That is more than enough, Zakai. You think I am stupid enough to take my son into battle, then maybe I should remind you about my intelligence.” Voice more of a snarl and growls as he was losing control of his temper. Setting her down, he rolled his shoulders out and readied to continue this fight.  
  
The pair could have gone at this all night, both of them bred for combat, her quickness making up for her lack of strength against him. Though it was never hard for him to overpower her, keeping a hold or blocking every attack was difficult. Her favored target seemed to be his loins at the moment, which was quickly eroding the loose control on his anger, and when she half caught him he broke.


	35. But They Awlays Make Up

Feeling pressure against her throat and then her back slammed to one of the walls, while she watched him stalk towards her, hand outstretched, a hand threatening to tighten his grasp. Had this been any other night she might have enjoyed this as foreplay. Gasping a little as he held her there, she stared at him with such contempt she may have been able to melt durosteel beams with her glare.   
  
“I said enough,” after a long and bloody mission he had looked forward to coming home to her, finding comfort in knowing he would have her to himself. Lip curling exposing his sharp canines, fighting a battle on two fronts now. Wanting nothing more than to take her against the wall he held her against and wanting to tell her off for what she had done. Pressing his luck he got close to her almost falling into their normal routine.   
  
Growling still, she composed herself long enough to catch him and him to drop her as he dropped cupping tender bits between his legs. Catching herself one of those long, slender, and powerful legs, caught him in the face. She knew what she was doing as her agility and speed were her best weapon against him, darting for the kitchen she hadn’t thought about the speed of his recovery. Feeling an arm wrapping around her waist while his free hand wound it’s way to her hair, grabbing a large fistful at the back of her head.  
  
Using her own momentum against her he slammed her against the table in the dining room. Without thinking his hips rolled against her backside, while he held her as he pleased. “You never did understand stop,” his tone all growl as he released her waist hand moving to grasp her wrists. Thighs catching her leg as she tried again to catch him, chuckling a little. “Keep going.”  
  
Struggling against him she growled, “He could have been killed. You took our son into battle. You caused this by not turning your comm on long enough for me to talk to you. I had no one to turn to.” She felt the grip on her hair lax. “They wouldn’t tell me where you were or who you were with.  Just the areutii who pushed you out heirs. ‘You are not his wife.’ ‘You just gave him children and he still wants to fuck you.’ I called you so many times, I had clung to Kessy and cried. I screamed at you. I begged for your help.” There it was his grip on her, even the pressure he was putting on her hips against the table relaxed or let go completely.  
  
“How do you think I felt Zakai? Staring at Emroc on my ship, me covered in gore. I didn’t know he was there. I was focused on my mission, on what I needed to do to come home to you.”   
  
“I needed you, Canderous! I needed you to just pick up your comm and talk to me. That’s it. I needed you… and you weren’t there.” Tears welling up as she felt him turn her around and pull her close, his arms wrapped around her. “It hurt, I lost Emroc and you in the same moment. I lost two of the only things in this galaxy I care about.”   
  
Pressing ear against his chest she listened to his heart beats, slowly slipping her arms around his waist. Wanting nothing more than to bury herself in him, anger subsiding as she sobbed silently, fingernails lightly digging into his flight suit.  
  
“I am sorry, my dear Echani. I didn’t think. I just wanted to get home. I needed to make sure you were alright.”  
  
Now regretting her actions so very much, she sighed, her emotions slowly settling. “I am sorry too, I shouldn’t have struck you. I should have talked to you. I had no control of myself. Please, leave a private comm channel on for me, for them, for us. You can shut everyone else out, but please let me stay.”  
  
A silent nod as he agreed to this, it was the least he could do for her. Picking her up and wrapping her legs around his waist, he nipped at her jawline, playing on her weaknesses for the moment. Trying his best to ease everything they had gone through.


	36. Dress for Success

Spending a lot of time in his workshop avoiding everything that had gone on to clear his head and let Zakai clear hers. What he was working on was special, knowing his wife’s fondness for designer clothing, and looking over what she had browsed on the holonet a few times. He had never done something like this, make jewelry for her sure, but this, this was different. This took time and a nifty learning curve, but he did it. Once the dress was done he packed it in a box and left it there in his workshop, he had plans to make so he could try to help repair the issue at hand.  
  
Getting the children ready and shipped off to Shem’s, then setting up food to be brought in for her, all while she was still in the house and being the best she could be. Though giving credit to the man he did pull it off. “Dinner, in the garden. The kids are at Shem’s for the night. Wear something nice.”  
  
Zakai stared at him as she was not sure what he was up to but she wasn’t going to argue with him. “Alright, Canderous.” Heading for the bedroom she sighed as she picked out something she liked and that made her feel pretty, even something that Cander enjoyed pulling off of her.   
  
Heading for the gardens she opened the door and smiled, it was perfect, low lighting, a blanket set out with dishes of her favorite food, and him in plain clothing with a simple white box tucked to the side. “Seeing you out of armor is… Nice. Strange, but nice.”  
  
“I feel like I am naked, so the feeling is mutual. Sit, please.”  
  
Taking her spot next to him she smiled softly and leaned in on him, it was nice to feel close to him again. It felt right at the moment, it felt like home again. Smiling more as his arm slipped around her lower back and pulled her even closer, then his lips pressed to her cheek.   
  
“Hungry?”  
  
Nodding softly she was about to reach for her food when he pushed her hand away she glanced at him and smirked. Watching him pick up a slice of sushi and feeding it to her, it was cute to her, different and unexpected but still enjoyed. “Are you trying to make me feel worse about what I did?”  
  
“No, I just want to remind you of your importance to me. Too much?”  
  
Laughing a little she turned her head and kissed his cheek, “No. Just different. I am rather impressed you got the children out of the house with me there. And this, this is wonderful. Even though I don’t feel like I deserve this.”  
  
Soon it became laughter and loving exchanges between them and before long they were laid back on the blanket wrapped up in each other. Her listening to the sound of his hearts, while his fingers trailed through her hair, this was heaven for them at the moment, and something they both needed.  
  
“I will keep a comm on for you and only you. I understand that need. This is all you have, this is all I want. I love you and I don’t know what I would do if I lost you or the twins.”  
  
Those words again and now she was unsure if she could say them, if she felt like she deserved to say them to him. She gave him silence which in turn he gave her a saddened sigh, but still kept her close and showering with simple affections. Taking her time to change the subject, she looked up at him, “Cander, what’s in the box?”  
  
“Oh, yes. It is a gift for you. I thought you might like it.”  
  
Sitting up with him, and looking at the box as he set it in her lap, she glanced at him and smiled. Opening it she smiled, it was a dress in her color, that was a big surprise. Pulling it out she smiled brighter, and then looked to him, “This is the dress I have been looking at for a few weeks. Its suppose to be all the rage from my favored designer.” Looking for tags her brow furrowed as she didn’t find any, heck she didn’t find any maker tags.   
  
“I made it. I know you liked the jewe-”  
  
Cutting him off she tackled him back to the ground and locked him in a fiery kiss, practically climbing on top of him as she expressed her feelings over the dress. “I love it. This is better than the designer on Coruscant. This… This, my wonderful horned king, is the best gift you have given me, next to my ring and our children.” Pressing her forehead to his she chewed her lower lip before instigating more from him.

 


	37. Or Dress for Him

After the dress was handed over to her, she got to spend a lovely night and morning with him before he left, one of the clan heads had invited him out for a hunting trip. While she understood her place in their world, didn’t mean she wasn’t jealous that she couldn’t go and hunt too, but she also knew he would take her later for their own hunt.   
  
Getting the twins down for their midday nap she moved to the table and set to work, she had already dyed most of the dress black, leaving only the symbol of the Mandalorians large on the front of the dress. Now she was set to task to sew each and every sequin onto the dress, she didn’t just want to rub it in the face of the twelve, she wanted to brand it into their memory for the rest of their lives. While part of her felt wrong for changing the dress he made her, she was tenacious in the idea, she mostly just hoped it would be done before his return.  
  
Use to the weeks of away time she had found her own routine of watching the children and working on things she enjoyed in the little down time she got. By the time he returned home, it was done, the last stitch going in a few hours before he would walk into through the door.   
  
She was busy in the kitchen while the twins were giggling and fighting in the play room. That’s when she felt them, his arms seeming to effortlessly slip around her bare waist, while lips found the side of her neck. “I suppose meal prep can wait. How was your hunt?”  
  
“Good, the twins?”  
  
“They were good, well as they can be. Roc keeps trying to dominate Kessy in play, but she gives him the slip every so often.” Hearing his chuckle she smiled, she did miss him when he was gone. “Cander. I have something for you. I hope you like it. Go love on our children. There will be time for us later.” Wiggling in his grasp to try and free herself, she laughed a little watching him play and try to hold her tighter before letting go and walking off to where the twins were. This would allow her to finish what she was doing.  
  
Once finished she turned her attention to Cander and their little ones as they roughhoused and giggles spilled over. She could have watched them in these moments for the rest of her life.


	38. No, The Dress for Him

Leading him back to their room after tucking in the Twins she smiled, “I hope you like it.” Opening the door she looked at the manikin in the room with the now sequined dress that she had pulled together from his work. Glancing to him she watched as he seemed amused with the fact this dress held the mythosaur skull. She thought it was fitting, thought it was rather clever and well done.   
  
“The Wife of Mand’alor needed this.”  
  
Laughing she moved closer to him and wrapped her arms around him. “I thought you would like it. I think the Secretary will start wearing it to public events with that asshole the Mand’alor.” Smirking she kissed his shoulder and relaxed with him.   
  
“Don’t let him hear you say that, might decide to marry you in public.”  
  
The pair could and would play about their situation, the fact he was the Mand’alor, the fact she often played his secretary, it was a way the made normal of their odd arrangement. Now is when he turned and picked her up wrapping her legs around his waist, lips finding hers as he slowly made his way over to their bed.   
  
“I can’t wait to pull it off of you.”  
  
Laughing she kissed his cheek and moved her hand to one of his horns, pulling his forehead to hers. “I figure you would like that thought too. I am glad you are home now. Cander,” she paused looking into his eyes, “I missed you this time. I have the twins to keep me company, they often slipped into the bed with me. But I missed my Mandalorian.”  
  
Soon kisses turned to nips and bites, and nips and bites would turn into more as they both welcomed each other back to their home. Reminding them they still loved and wanted each other.


	39. Clean Slate

Staring at her half painted face it was a strange feeling for her. Here she had erased the past of who she was and what she had done to herself. Wiped the slate clean so to speak, touching the now stark white skin of her face, her fingertips slowly tracing over where the thick bold lines of her tattoos had been.

"I feel like I am staring at a ghost."

Powdered, painted, and masked a foreign thought to her but now it was slow to settle in her mind. She kept glancing over her shoulder in the mirror to look at him as he watched her cover the thick black lines on her face. The way her fingers smudged the lines and the brush covered them almost perfectly.

"Maybe this was a mistake. Maybe I should scrub it clean."

He chuckled at her sudden change in tune, she had come in with the bags and her upper arms clean of tattoos. Singing and dancing around like she had found the secret to immortality. And yet here she was questioning what she had done, it was sweet.

"This should have been the face you saw. The one you fell in love with."

"Perhaps, but I would still love you no matter what you looked like. I love you because of who you are, not what you look like. But I suppose it does help to have snagged the most beautiful woman in the galaxy."

Smirking from his words, she looked at her face, she could still see them, as if the makeup didn't work, but she could see it was truly her white face. Unsure of how this made her feel she looked at herself more.

"It could be like this forever. I have looked at those lines for so long I don't know what to do without them. I even miss them."  
  
Feeling his arms wrap around her shoulders and lips find the cook of her neck, she sighed. There was always comfort with him, no matter what she did he was always there for her. Grinning a moment she reached up and gave him a line across his face. Laughing as he growled softly and moved to pick her up, while she still painted his face white.   
  
While he carried her to the refresher she smiled till it sunk in what he had in mind, “Don’t you care Cander. NO! Cander stop it! Put me down!” Though she fought him she still ended up in the refresher stall drowned in water, the makeup barely budging from her face. “I just got these... Now they are wet and smeared with un-set concealer.”  
  
“Well, let's take them off then. Maybe that will keep My Echani’s frilly underwear from ruining more?”


End file.
